Gingerbread Girls & Boys

These cookies epitomize Christmas; what is more festive than a brigade of gingerbread cookies, marching across your counter? But even better than the cookies themselves is the SMELL....the sweet & spicy smell of gingerbread, wafting through your house. So light the tree, turn on Bing Crosby and go to the extra effort this year. You'll feel like Donna Reed!

The mis-en-place: (remember, that's fancy French-talk for "git yer stuff.") Dark molasses, brown sugar, water (not pictured), shortening, flour, baking powder, salt, allspice, ginger, cloves and cinnamon.
1. Mix molasses, brown sugar, water & shortening.
2. Mix in remaining ingredients. I think you may need a heavy-duty mixer for this one, folks. A Kitchenaid or Bosch. Add flour until you get a stiff, rollable dough--like sugar cookies.You'll need between 6 & 7 cups of flour; add flour until you get to 5½ cups, mix the dough & check the consistency, then add another ½ cup (that brings you to 6 cups), & check consistency. Six cups should be enough. Because (cough) I just dumped in the whole 7 cups and the result was cement. I may have burned out the motor in my poor Kitchenaid. (are you listening Santa?) And I had to go back & add a molasses/water combo to thin the dough. But enough of me...

Be sure to let your little elves assist you! They really like the smell of molasses, as you can see.
The dough is golden and spicy and should be soft and rollable, but not too soft or it will be a sticky mess all over your countertop. Squish and pinch it in your fingertips to test it.3. Utilizing the slave-labor of aforementioned elves, roll dough ¼" thick on a floured board. Lightly flour your countertop before rolling them out; you don't want your gingerbread people to look like road kill.
4. Bake at 350 degrees for 8-10 minutes. Take them right off the pan to the cooling rack. Mix up a huge batch of frosting & color it however you want for clothes, eyes & hair.

* Crystal's expert, savvy, professional tip: Don't be an idiot, like me, and do this when you're ready to actually start frosting the cookies--while your kids wait, then start asking "When are we going to be ready," then start fighting, then start throwing balls of leftover gingerbread dough at each other...you get the picture. Mix the frosting the day before! Or while they're at school! Refrigerate it, then take it out an hour or so before it's time to frost so it softens. It always takes longer than I think to make the frosting and color it.

So learn from my idiocy: do it in peace & quiet while they're at school. Or just tie them up while you do it so they can't throw ginger-balls at you.
I use disposable bags (my mom's brilliant discovery) because washing out decorating bags gives me brain cramps. You can find them at any craft store. I use a #29 or #30 star tip and #3 or #4 round tip. But anything works.
After going to all this work, don't skimp on the frosting! Here's a secret: after sitting overnight (in a container with a lid), the frosting softens the cookies so they melt in your mouth. Some mysterious chemical process occurs overnight--involving protons and neutrons, I'm quite sure of it--and cookie & frosting become ONE.
So load on as much frosting as your conscience allows and then have one for breakfast the next morning.
Recipe: Gingerbread People, courtesy of my Mom
1 ½ cups dark molasses
1 cup brown sugar
2/3 cup cold water
1/3 cup shortening
6-7 cups flour
2 tsp baking powder
1 tsp salt
1 tsp allspice
2 tsp ginger
1 tsp cloves
1 tsp cinnamon

1. Mix molasses, brown sugar, water and shortening. Mix in remaining ingredients, starting with 5½ cups flour and adding more little by little. You will probably only need 6 cups. Cover and refrigerate an hour or so.

2. Heat oven to 350. Roll dough ¼ " thick on floured board. Cut out people. Place about 2" apart on lightly greased cookie sheet. Bake for 8-10 minutes.