Gingerbread (cracker) Houses

All you gingerbread purists better leave now. I love making gingerbread cookies, but I don't do houses. Maybe someday. Not this day. I like the cute little size of these tiny little houses. I like that they fit the attention span of kids. But really, it comes down to the fact that I am terrified of measuring and cutting a template. What if I go to all that work and the pieces of the house don't fit together? So get yourself a couple of (big) boxes of Honeymaid graham crackers and roll up yer sleeves.

First, cut the pieces. you can just snap the 4 square sides, but for the roof you'll need to GENTLY cut triangles. No chopping! No hacking! This part is for surgeon-hands! Gently use a light sawing motion. Then stack up your pieces into piles for each house. And don't forget to cover some small-ish pieces of cardboard with foil.
To stick the houses together, you are going to avoid frosting and glue guns. No! Put that glue gun back! Just trust me. I'm not sure who concocted this secret glue-brew, my aunt or my grandmother (a.k.a. Nana), but it works like cement. So. Heat a skillet over medium-high heat and toss in a cup of white sugar. Let it melt down. Meanwhile, get a few stacks of crackers ready by the stovetop.
It starts to get lumpy as it melts.
And then it turns really dark and gooey. AND HOT. As in scorching, melt-your-flesh hot. So put on your rubber gloves for this next part. And I mean it, kids! Do not, under any circumstances, attempt to dip your crackers into this without the proper protection. I knew a certain girl who, her first time, was arrogant and brash and thought herself kitchen-proficient enough to skip the gloves. I'm not going to reveal who she is, but she was an idiot. Ouch. (Except for I screamed "ouch.")
Construct roof section first: dip ‘eave’ edges of roof triangles in
sugar; attach roof pieces to that; let dry a moment, then attach the
other triangle piece.

Stick that onto the flat part of the roof.
Then do the same thing with the other eave.
Dip the edges of the other side of the eaves and stick on the other roof piece.
Wa-la! A roof!
You'll start to feel the rhythm. Every year it takes a few houses before I remember how I work it best. Mostly because I go carefully and uncertainly at first--due to that burning hot lava, er, sugar, which scares me. But after a few tries, you'll get better. These next three photos are my 4th house. Notice how they're much more neatly done. No brown goo dripped all over. (But who cares? It's just going to get covered in frosting and Necco Wafers.)
Then dip a side of your wall in sugar and stick it onto another side, which you'll have laying down, waiting. Do the same with a 3rd side.
Let the three sides dry for a few seconds, then pick it up and dip the unfinished edges.
(I was having fun showing how to dip the last side! My cameraman deserted me to go play Legos, so I was dipping with one hand & snapping photos with the other. How's THAT for bravado in the face of boiling, blistering hot sugar-danger?)
Put your three-sided house down, then stick the last wall onto it. Dip the bottom of the roof and then attach it to the walls. (I wasn't dexterous enough to take that photo.)
Gather ye candy while ye may, and go for it! Use the frosting recipe below--and be sure to beat it for the entire seven minutes! Somewhere between six and seven minutes, it magically turns to superglue. Disguised as frosting.

Now you could just pick up a pre-fab gingerbread house at the grocery store, like the rest of the Yuletide sheep, but who wants to break open their holiday spirit out of cellophane? Baaa. Try doing your own house this year!

Royal Icing
(old BHG cookbook, page 85)

3 egg whites - room temperature
1 lb powdered sugar [about 4 3⁄4 cups] -
1⁄2 t cream of tartar
1 t vanilla [optional]

Combine egg whites, powdered sugar, cream of tartar and vanilla and beat with electric mixer 7-10 minutes or until frosting is very stiff. (Just trust me: beat for at least 7 mins)

Keep covered with damp cloth at all times to prevent crust forming. Makes 3 cups.

Spoon frosting into ziplock baggies and cut a tiny hole in one corner. Make your kids sign a waiver stating that they accept your cleanup terms before allowing them to frost.